In Your Vagina
When 27-year-old Karin Mackaliunas was taken into custody by police after a car accident this March, investigators in Pennsylvania suspected she may have been involved in a recent robbery. After a routine search turned up three bags of heroin in her coat, she later admitted that she had "hidden more heroin in her vagina." A cavity search later located "up to 54 bags of heroin, 31 empty bags used to package heroin, 8.5 prescription pills and $51.22," according to the criminal complaint.
In Your Butt
According to local authorities, Clarell Jamar Colbert, 19, pictured, was arrested in Florida for possession of crack cocaine. The man had allegedly hidden a vial of the drug in his buttocks. A drug-sniffing dog discovered the hidden contraband after noting a "narcotic odor" coming from the man's posterior.
In Your Stomach
Art Taylor, pictured, of Framingham, MA was arrested last December after he allegedly swallowed a bag of cocaine in an attempt to hide it from officers after he was pulled over. In a small victory for cocaine baggie swallowers world wide, Taylor was not charged with possession of drugs. He did manage to walk away with a sweet door prize of assault and battery, resisting arrest, disorderly conduct, not using a turn signal and failure to produce license and registration charges. Good job!
In Your Bible
Edward Lee Williams, 17, was being booked into a detention center in Monroe, LA last summer when security officials noticed his "Extreme Faith" contemporary Bible. As they later told police, when they fanned through the pages, they found a piece of notebook paper containing six rocks of cocaine. Records did not mention which bible passage the drugs were found on, but we'd like to think it was Samuel 1:17:48, which discusses the potential perils of slinging rocks.
In Your Child's Diaper
David Shepard, 23, pictured, was arrested and charged last September in Waco, TX after a local day care center called police to let them know that they had just located a small baggie of marijuana in the diaper of Mr. Shepard's one-year-old baby. This left police with two options, either he was a terrible drug smuggler, or wasn't feeding his child properly. Both are frowned on by the law.
Dropped Onto A Stranger's House
Several homeowners near the town of Greenville, TX were surprised to hear loud thumps on their roofs on a July morning in 2010. They were even more surprised to find out that the noises were caused by large duffel bags of high-grade, hydroponic marijuana falling from the sky. A single engine plane carrying two more bags of the substance was found abandoned in a field close to a nearby airport. Was it a frustrated dealer? Or was it the marijuana faerie? The world may never know.
In A Box With Your Name On It
Rebekah Michal Tracht-Kader, pictured, was pulled over in Holiday, FL for driving through a stop sign last year, and according to sheriff's deputies, she reeked of alcohol and marijuana. When officers searched her car they say they found a green plastic box labeled "Rebekah's pot." Any guesses what was in it? (Hint: it wasn't cookware.)
In A Way-Overpacked Light Plane
In 2008, a pilot of an "ultralight" plane crashed southwest of Tucson. Federal officials suspect that the plane's cargo, over 350 pounds of marijuana, caused the pilot to clip some electrical lines, causing the crash. Ironically, it seems the pilot, who survived the crash, had all that marijuana, yet still was unable to get high enough to avoid his fate.
Inside Something Else That Is Also Illegal
40-year-old Martin Ortega Perez, pictured, was pulled over last February by Tehama County, CA police deputies, and they allegedly found an open beer in his vehicle. After pouring the alcoholic beverage out by the roadside, a methamphetamine pipe fell out of the beer bottle.
Inside A Dog Toy
During a routine traffic stop, an Oregon sheriff's deputy saw a sock fly out the window of a pick-up truck he had pulled over. According to the deputy, the driver and his dog, a pit bull mix, had been playing a game of "tug of war" with a sock full of marijuana and hashish. The dog won the game, tossing the sock out onto the street. The owner lost the game and soon after, his freedom.
First in your rectum, then in your mouth, then in your son's mouth
Donald Curtis Denney, 56, pictured, and his son the "Hard Hat Bandit" had been plotting a rather sick exchange over a monitored phone line for months according to police.The father had planned to hide a golf ball sized portion of black tar heroin in his rectum, transfer it to his mouth and then attempt to pass the narcotics to his son via mouth kiss.Whoh. Did it just get cold in here?
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